This slice is a difficult one for me. It causes me great confusion and an inner battle that I just try to avoid most of the time. That is part of the issue with my weight. Avoiding and then beating myself up. Yesterday was one of those days.
We had our "health assessment" at work yesterday. My blood pressure was 109/77. My cholesterol was 179. My non fasting glucose was 95 (the range is equal to or less than 140) AWESOME! GREAT! WOOHOO!
Then comes the BMI. Body Mass Index. My results very high risk. And that became the focus of the conversation. Not the excellence in everything else. Once again, as always, I am condemned for what a "chart" says I should be. Words like morbidly obese seem to echo in my ear. Very high risk. I am given a handful of pamphlets on eating healthier, exercising, and weight control.
Yes I know all this. Can't you see my frustration here. I am working on trying to change this.
So my thoughts turn to an incredible poem that someone once gave me and told me this is how they see me.
Phenomenal Woman by Maya Angelou
Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I'm telling lies.
I say,
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.
I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It's the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.
Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say,
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.
Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.
