Walking in this WORLD

New Year’s Day! A day often filled with the excitement of plans for change.  The thrill and anticipation of starting something new to FINALLY get to be the person you want to be. What I am learning is it is the thrill, the excitement, and the NEW that is usually the motivator and the thing that can eventually lead to being stuck.  NOT the actual change.

Think about it.  The only REAL answer to the changes is consistent, committed, daily actions that support the changes you want and can become boring.  I know, in the past, that is what would derail me the quickest.  Boredom.

Boredom: the state of being weary and restless through a lack of interest. Boredom is a state of malaise, close to anxiety, and characterized by a feeling of emptiness.  Yep, the feeling of emptiness that I strive to fill.

The things that I know help motivate me are my spirituality based on the 12 steps, writing, the Artist Way, and being creative. It also puts me in a place where I worry what others think.  Artist can often be viewed as drifters, dreamers, undisciplined, sometimes even a bit crazy.  AND the flipside, I am a people pleaser and I yearn to be well liked.  I often worry too much about what others will think. That is the underlying conflict within my recovery.  It leads to the anxiety.  I just want to *feel* good but be good and well liked.  Feeling good about why I am here, what I think my purpose is.  That is my freedom I seek.

All my life, yes..all, I have been searching for some type of freedom.  My body yearns for that feeling, that physical reaction that will lead me to feeling free.  It can be an array of things that many people *think* it can be.  We tend to think as long as it fits in to what all the rest of us trying to live this healthy lifestyle than it is okay.  An exercise high, a new challenge, a misstep with a binge, a new diet, new book, new exercise dvd, or a new exercise routine at the gym can all briefly bring about that thrill, motivation, and excitement of some sort of freedom.   But, eventually I get bored with the routine.

So, I am currently working on CONTINUING.  Julia Cameron’s Walking in the World.  The PRACTICAL Art of Creativity.  It is deemed further steps along the Artist Way.  The added tool..the weekly WALK.

What motivates you? What about boredom? What allows you to feel free? What can you CONTINUE?

Comments

  1. hmmm what motivates me? wanting no LONGING to grow.
    to stretch.
    to be biggerbetterstrongerdifferent this time next year than I am right now.

  2. continuing is the key to success. It’s easy to start and more difficult to fulfill, or so I have learned. What keeps you continuing Jules especially during the times of “bored” and the need for new? I see the 12 steps etc, but on a daily basis?

  3. Today is just any other day. I am CONTINUING all that I know to do to make a healthier and happier me.

  4. Jules, you are working on finding you & doing what is right for you & I think that is what counts.. what is right for the person & that they can live with.

    I always say I am a work in progress & I view that as a good thing… I plan to continue trying!

  5. I like your statements about continuing. In fact, most of my goals for the coming year started with “continue.” Change comes from within… not from resolutions.